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  • Amina Aitsi-Selmi

The world has always been falling apart – and that’s not a bad thing [Wise Wednesdays]

The world has always been falling apart. And recreating itself again.

The apparent order we experience in our lives is the result of infinite cycles of creative destruction - ones that came before you and ones that you are participating in right now.

Destruction – reordering – destruction – reordering, etc.

You’ve probably had moments of realisation that none of the catastrophes that hit the world are personal. It’s just the way of things.

It was 1991 when my grandmother pointed this out to me in her own way. The civil war was breaking out and she simply said: things change. She had lived through two wars already. Almost 25 years later, while working on the UN Disaster Risk Reduction Global Strategy, I came across a scientific validation of her simple statement through Project Pandora. The Cambridge Centre for Risk Studies catalogued the major catastrophes that visited human society over 1000s of years in a bid to predict future risk. Conflict, floods, earthquake, pandemics, etc. It was only a matter of time before they struck again. And with this knowledge, we can prepare and respond more wisely.

Right, now we’re called to Release: let go of expectations of what life should look like.

We’re also being asked to Reconnect: identify what’s most important to you.

(You can find out more about the 6 Rs of creative cycles and how they can free us from the tyranny of rigid goals and expectations in The Success Trap book.)

What do you want to let go of and what do you want protect and nurture in your life going forward?

What dreams?

What relationships?

What opportunities?

In other words, are you willing to let go of one version of success and embrace a better one?

What does better mean? It’s the version that aligns with your true values, harnesses the opportunities around you and allows your energy to flow – right now. It feels ecstatically alive, not like a constant struggle.

Or as a client said last week: you no longer feel like you’re hanging by your fingernails trying to please others but that you’re dancing with life to your unique rhythm. You face your reality and create a new one from there.

Last weekend, I visited York where I grew up partly. It has many ancient churches and graveyards in its city centre. I like to interrogate those lying in the ground to see if I would have preferred a different life - in their era. The answer is invariably: no.

Your life is exactly the one you need to be living. Why? Because it’s yours.

Have a great week,


p.s. Next week, join me and my fellow career-leaper, friend and colleague Dr. Erin Baker – author of the bestselling “Joy-Full AF” and a Self-Leadership and Business Coach practising Internal Family Systems – for an open (free) Leaders Circle. You’ll explore narratives that limit your levels of happiness and how to transform restlessness into flow. More info and registration here >>

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