From conflict to connection through coherence | Shared Reality Leadership

Last week, I co-led a relational leadership session for a group of coaches. One man reacted very strongly to my first intervention.

The group froze. 

Some people wanted to mediate, others wanted a conflict resolution process, and a few understood that this was part of the work we were doing. 

I stayed with him in the tension and revealed the impact on me. He revealed his anger. We gradually wove our way back to a shared reality. It turns out he didn’t realise I was one of the co-leads and assumed I was a meddlesome participant. 

But realising his assumption wasn't the point. Nor were role clarity or power dynamics.

Friction is very human.

The practice, once conflict occurs, is to make contact by revealing our experience and inviting impact - weaving realities even in the midst of high charge.

Tomorrow, is the third Shared Reality Leadership session at the Liberating Leadership Lab, with a focus on coherence including:

1. Experience what it’s like to truly sit with complexity and the unknown while remaining steady

2. Allow coherence and spaciousness to transform tension (rather than automatically trying to fix it)

3. Practise simple conversational moves: revealing your experience, checking for impact, making requests, that help weave shared reality in any conversation.

From last month’s session: “The group session was phenomenal. I was profoundly impacted by how Amina brought the principles to life through an emergent conversation, and how skilfully she called out defences and supported the practice of what she called ‘reality weaving’ with live time-outs. - Joe Aston, Leadership and Team Coach.

This isn’t a sharing circle or teaching session. It’s a relational leadership praxis that requires a willingness to be impact-able (not necessarily vulnerable) and precise, with generous pausing and breathing.

Info and registration here.

Warmly,

Amina

P.S. This is a 75min open session online - June 24th 6pm UK / 1pm EST. It's exploratory. New people welcome.