Your life is fine.
- Amina Aitsi-Selmi
- Jun 17
- 2 min read
That's it this week.
You're on a digital device with food to eat, a roof over your head - and, hopefully, no bombs falling outside your window. I remember going to sleep in Algiers hearing heavy mortar rounds between the military and jihadists, and life somehow went on. We need so little to appreciate the sky. I want to be a voice that acknowledges you're doing fine, even if there are challenges, losses, and uncertainties.

Watching Everything, Everywhere, All at Once, I was reminded that no life is superior to another. The film unfolds like a deep coaching session breaking through the thought structure: if I get X done, then I will relax; or if person X behaves the right way, then I will be happy.
Evelyn, the main character in the film, discovers she's living the worst version of herself. Paradoxically, this gives her power: she has so much unrealised potential, she can do almost anything including saving her daughter and the multiverse from being sucked into a black hole of meaninglessness. Regret and unfulfilled goals become portals of liberation to another future. The film ultimately centres kindness – especially when we don't know what's going on. Meeting the moment with openness becomes the Middle Way between toxic positivity and cynicism. Love and acceptance are the balm for existential angst – a theme also found in The Unbearable Lightness of Being.
This isn't sentimentalism or 'being nice to each other'. It's clear-eyed goodwill which can involve letting each other go, knowing we're still connected on some level.
Kindness isn't weak will. It's metabolising aggression to allow space for something other than violence to unfold. It's the grounded core of love.
The most liberating definition of love I heard recently is from biologist and philosopher Humberto Maturana: love is letting the other appear.
And that includes you. Let yourself appear.
Have a great week,
Amina
P.S. Join me and a small group on Wednesday 24th for the next Shared Reality Leadership lab focusing on the experience of coherence within and between ourselves. What's it like to lead without hiding or dominating and how to tend to others without leaving yourself out. Open to all. Register here.
And if you're making a big decision and would like focused support to break through a procrastination rut or thought loops, book a 5R Decision Coaching session.
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