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  • Amina Aitsi-Selmi

Why your ‘weirdness’ is a gift [Wise Wednesdays]

Updated: Dec 13, 2023

If you have a slightly unusual background, you might feel like a perpetual outsider. And that’s actually an asset to groups you’re part of. Change comes from diversity. So one thing I'm proud of in 2021 is owning my weird.

Last Friday, I found myself in a traditional British pub, talking spirituality and personal development with others who are equally passionate about those things - and it felt like home.

But thinking back to 25 years ago, each of those 3 things would have been a bit weird to some...

Spirituality – I remember the first time I went to a meditation session in 1998 with two friends. No one else came. Meditation was weird…But holding on to a spiritual practice, even if it was seen as woo woo or irrational in scientific institutions I was part of, has been the backbone of my mental health.

Personal development – I bought my first self-help book at Waterstones at 17 during a difficult relationship. My friends used to joke about my shelf-help obsession (and who’s the weird looking guy with the cheesy grin?... (Tony Robbins)). I’m grateful for this obsession though because 20 years later, it spurred me to create my own job and business.

Pubs – well, I couldn’t quite win here because my more religious friends would raise an eyebrow if I was in a pub and my friends who loved a pint and chinwag at the pub wondered how I could enjoy myself without alcohol. But to me, it was the community spirit of the quintessential British pub experience with friends that I loved, even if it I was a bit weird that I nursed a glass of water all evening as a tall forest of pint glasses grew on the table!

Own your weird. It’s what makes you unique and adds flavour and dynamism to the social fabric.

What are you proud of this 2021 and what weird are you owning?

p.s. For the past two or three years I’ve offered an annual intuitive goal-setting workshop. But I want you to have the time back and put space in your calendar to sit and breathe. If you’d like some journaling prompts, here are the ones I’m working with and that I’ve shared with my private clients.

1. What are you proud of in 2021?

2. What inspires and energises you now?

3. What self-doubts are you ready to let go of?

4. Who are you without this self-doubt?

5. What becomes possible without these doubts in 2022?

The important thing is to answer these questions in a meditative state (i.e. a right brained or alpha-wave state), not a purely rational or repetitive thinking state (left brained or beta-wave state). So take some quiet time perhaps in the early morning or late at night, put some pleasant music on or light a candle and imagine you’re an ancient alchemist or oracle. If you want some help dropping into this state, here’s a one-minute meditation for busy high achievers!

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