One of the first Wise Wednesdays in 2016 was called The High Achiever’s Secret Dream. It explored the hidden drives behind achievement a few months after a big career leap.
This is an update sharing insights from the years that followed...
The Achiever’s Path
Over the past decade, working with ambitious yet contemplative High Achievers and changemakers, I’ve noticed three approaches to achievement:
Survival-Driven Achievement: Conventional success—pursued at any cost, prioritising societal expectations like wealth, status, and career.
Escape-Driven Achievement: Unconventional success—rejecting societal norms to seek peace in alternative communities or monasteries.
Vision-Based Achievement: Post-success—where achievement is a natural byproduct of alignment with an inner vision, detached from external validation, leading to fulfilment.
As people grow, they often transition from conventional success to post-success, with a phase of escape in between. This shift leads to deeper fulfilment and flow in life.
Boundaries as Mini Rituals
Since 2016, I’ve realised that boundaries are central to transformation.
Historically, we’ve used rituals—like coming-of-age initiations, weddings, funerals—to mark life transitions. Psychologically, we need to grieve losses, learn from the past, and create space for new possibilities. We must set boundaries with our old selves for the new self to emerge.
In the workplace, meaningful rituals are rare—perhaps a leaving party, if that. How do we create space to transition from roles like employee to entrepreneur, expert to leader, or corporate climber to disruptor?
Unless we have a community or guide to navigate the depths of these identity shifts, our daily boundaries—through our ‘yeses’ and ‘nos’—can serve as mini-rituals. These small acts help us refocus on what truly matters, turning boundaries into a transformational practice that shapes our life as it unfolds.
Boundaries become mini-rituals to signal, protect and facilitate the expression of what’s important to us both in times of transition but also in continuously reaffirming what we are committed to.
Vision Over Achievement
As a recovering overachiever, I’ve had to set boundaries with myself—not to chase external approval, but to align with my inner vision. This shift enabled me to take a significant career leap nearly 10 years ago.
I stopped engaging in anything competitive—whether job interviews or fencing tournaments. I needed to let that part of me rest so I could connect with my deeper desires and the vision within me.
This mindset has also helped me see achievement as a byproduct of serving that inner vision, rather than something driven by external rewards.
[Photo] Nothing makes an overachiever smile like a golden trophy… as a byproduct of the vision, rather than the goal itself! I'm grateful to Women in Management for this Leadership in Coaching and Education award, made from special Sri Lankan minerals. It was awarded at the House of Lords in March but received last week.
Play your unique notes in the great symphony of life.
Have a great week,Amina
P.S. Are you working on managing your boundaries? Join us for a deep dive on how to use boundaries to strengthen relationships, maintain integrity, and lead more effectively. Free registration here>>
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