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  • Amina Aitsi-Selmi

Stop Scrolling and Do It [Wise Wednesdays]

Stop Scrolling and Do It [Wise Wednesdays]

Are you scrolling more these days?

We spend an average of 2 to 3 hours a day scrolling…And there seems to be a direct correlation between collective anxiety or individual burnout and scrolling time (with a 50% increase in scrolling time during the pandemic). Social media is doing very well at providing a dopamine-laden escape from the challenges of being human in uncertain times.

Usually, distractions help us avoid something we find tricky:

- Backing out of a commitment with an acquaintance

- Sending in your resignation / application

- Letting go of that old shirt

- Throwing away (or drastically slimming down) your to-do list

- Asking someone to be mindful of venting every time you meet

- Exercising…Resting…

When I find myself scrolling excessively, it's usually to avoid one of 3 core personal challenges:

1. Relaxing and giving my brain a break (it took me 34 years to get a handle on this).

2. Connecting with my feelings and needs to heal a sense of alienation/loneliness.

3. Facing overwhelm and revising unrealistic timelines.

Legend in the making: Dr B is a career long Public Health Consultant with the experience of a sage. But she found it hard to put herself first. Resting was like the small print on a contract you never read. But this took its toll and eventually she had to face the reality and learn to Lean Back. We focused on a mindset shift to help her embrace what Italians call ‘Il Dolce Far Niente’ (the sweetness of doing nothing). She started to see that Self-Care is not small print but a Core Agreement in her approach to work and leadership. The power of self-care began to ripple through her life. She also decided to say goodbye to her current job and channel her energy into negotiating a new role in a different organisation that put both her personal needs and leadership vision centre stage. Tanti auguri!

Addressing overwhelm often means saying 'no,' letting go of something or asking for space. The fear of letting others down, being punished or being perceived as ‘lazy’ or incompetent can come up and get in the way. When I welcome these fears (aka my inner-imposter), its panicky grip on my energy calms down, and the next step becomes clearer and less scary.

The future is a place to come from, not a place to get to.

To embody the future you want to see, what do you need to face, today? What are you avoiding?

If in doubt, try one of these 5:

1. Automate

2. Outsource

3. Delegate

4. Eliminate (most of what we think we should do, does not need to be done by you or by anyone…)

5. Educate (this is the difficult conversations around boundaries and making requests)

Stop Scrolling and Do It. You have my support 100%. And your Future Self thanks you.

Presence Power Possibility.


Upcoming events to take action on your vision as a leader, professional or coach.

[In person] June 15th: RSA House, London. Fellows Festival in-person session - What can go right? Progress, presence and stumbling on success (open to all)

[Online] July 11th: Speedcoaching explore how ‘lightbulb moments’ happen and practice deep coaching skills.

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